Grace: The Power of Acceptance
Each of us shares a God-given need to be accepted and to belong. Acceptance is the emotional experience of being valued, included, and embraced for who we are. It is the opposite of rejection, shame, and condemnation.
Thankfully, God has met our greatest need for His acceptance through Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross. God so loved us that He gave His Son to meet our greatest need for forgiveness, life, and acceptance.
Colossians 1:21 And although you were formerly alienated and hostile in mind, engaged in evil deeds, 22 yet He has now reconciled you in His fleshly body through death, in order to present you before Him holy and blameless and beyond reproach…
We didn’t merit what He did for us, but in His great love for us, Jesus paid everyone’s sin debt on the cross so we could be reconciled and treated as holy and blameless. The Gospel assures us that God accepts us without conditions.
The Gospel assures us that God accepts us without conditions.
This is God’s grace to the undeserving and is meant to affect our lives.
Romans 15:7 Therefore, accept one another, just as Christ also accepted us to the glory of God.
While God’s acceptance in Christ is complete and unwavering, we still need acceptance and belonging with others—not everyone, but significant others.
While God’s acceptance in Christ is complete and unwavering, we still need acceptance and belonging with others—not everyone, but significant others.
The very first man, Adam, was created sinless and walked with God, yet God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone.” He had needs that God chose not to directly but indirectly fulfill by giving him Eve.
Or think of a baby: she doesn’t need everyone to “coo-coo” at her and tell her how precious she is, but she does need her mother’s acceptance.
Now think of your husband, wife, or child: They don’t just want your acceptance; they need it. No one here needs every Christian’s acceptance, but they need our church’s acceptance.
Acceptance doesn’t mean condoning harmful behavior or turning a blind eye to sin. Acceptance offers a relationship that values the person, separates behavior from identity, knows everyone sins and is messy, and communicates, “You belong here, even at your worst, and we’ll be like Christ with you even through your struggles.”
Acceptance doesn’t mean condoning harmful behavior or turning a blind eye to sin. Acceptance offers a relationship that values the person, separates behavior from identity, knows everyone sins and is messy, and communicates, “You belong here, even at your worst…”
When you love and accept someone after hearing the darkest secrets they struggle with and accept them while everyone else mocks them, for some, it’s too good to be true. Many a wounded person has tested such acceptance with the worst they have. (They won’t relinquish their heart, fearing they’ll be rejected or abandoned again.) But as they are surrounded with love and protection, that’s grace, and when it is experienced, grace melts the hardest hearts. It breaks the cycle of having to prove themselves.
Many a wounded person has tested such acceptance with the worst they have. (They won’t relinquish their heart, fearing they’ll be rejected or abandoned again.) But as they are surrounded with love and protection, that’s grace, and when it is experienced, grace melts the hardest hearts.
Grace in our homes allows us to be goofy, have fun, dance, try new things, make mistakes, admit our faults, and even let others help us, knowing we are accepted even if we don’t seem to fit in.
We want that in our church. This is the joy of the Gospel. It doesn’t lead to sin. It allows us to grow and extend that same grace to others.
The love that meets people’s longing for acceptance and has the power to transform lives is “agape love”—unearned love and unmerited favor (i.e., grace.
In contrast, when the need for acceptance is unmet in the home or by significant others, when they hear judgment and ultimatums (“You had better change or else”), the effects are devastating. Feelings of loneliness, low self-worth, rejection, and shame (“What’s wrong with me?”) can lead to destructive behaviors as they desperately seek the belonging they need.
When the need for acceptance is unmet by significant others… the effects are devastating. Feelings of loneliness, low self-worth, rejection, and shame can lead to destructive behaviors as they desperately seek the belonging they need.
Psalm 103:8-14 underscores the undeserved love and unearned beauty of God’s acceptance in Christ. He does not deal with us according to our sins, forgives and removes our transgressions from us, is compassionate, and knows our humanity. This fills our hearts, frees us from worrying, and draws us in.
Our churches, above all, should be havens of grace where the lost, the broken, and the outcast find the embrace of a God who sees them, knows them, and loves them beyond measure.